Learning To Love…Yourself.

Today hashtags are a powerful part of popular culture. With images of your favourite celebrities living their best lives, loved up and experiencing luxuries most of us only dream of, it’s easy to feel like your life is missing something.

Online vs Reality

It’s unhealthy to constantly watch celebrity news and take their online lives as “real life”. Trying to keep up with the online Couple Goals can leave people having to deal with unrealistic expectations from their partners. Not to mention the unrealistic expectations we put on ourselves.

Some men will fantasize over Instagram models but in reality, most do not look like the pictures they display. It can leave the ordinary woman with a desire to look more like the models who seem to live a carefree lifestyle filled with luxuries and expensive trips all because they “look” beautiful. Now, of course, it is right that women put their best foot forward but many end up getting surgery trying to look like the Kylies, Nicki’s and Iggy’s of the world.

No matter how much makeup you wear the average woman will never look like Kim K. Most women do not have the budget or means to have a Kim K’s expensive style & beauty regime. Can you imagine how much it costs for her upkeep?

Be Comfortable In Your Skin

So now you know that today’s beauty standard is not realistic, what can you do to raise your confidence and love yourself more. Below are our top 5 tips to loving yourself.

1. Know yourself. It’s hard to love yourself if you don’t truly know who you are. Invest time and discover what you believe, value, and like.

Start surrounding yourself with people who treat you with respect. Who we spend our time with reflects how we feel about ourselves. People who feel valued and worthy hang around and regularly associate themselves with positive people. Loving yourself can also mean ending relationships with toxic, abusive or unkind people. Setting boundaries are an essential form of self-care because they let others know that you deserve, expect and demand respect. Being assertive is a way of showing others that your opinions and needs matter.

2. Recognise and use your strengths. We all have amazing gifts and talents, but many of us tend to hide our greatness because we fear being judged and ridiculed by the naysayers. Being distracted by another persons success can make it harder for you to focus on your strengths. Focus on you, what you are doing, creating and achieving. This will increase your positive feelings about yourself. Be honest with yourself. Stop downplaying your success or lying to yourself and ignoring the great work you are doing. Some of us as so good at self-sabotage that we don’t even realise we’re doing it. Honesty is important in all relationships and your relationship with yourself is no different. True self-love means to enjoy the good, accept the bad and taking responsibility and being accountable for your actions.

3. Forgive your mistakes and imperfections. We are often the most critical of ourselves. Give yourself a break and embrace your humanness. Mistakes are a normal part of life but learning from your mistakes is more important.  Your imperfections are part of what makes you unique. Sometimes we are held back by past regrets or transgressions. Self-forgiveness is the healing process of believing you honestly did the best you could. It’s completely unfair to yourself to continuously judge your past self. Today we know better and those who know better do better.

4. Practice gratitude, acknowledge your success & express your feelings. Gratitude is one of the easiest ways to focus on the good in your life. Every day try identifying 3 things you’re grateful for and you will soon see you have a lot more than 3 things every single day to be grateful for. Gratitude aligns you with the frequency of love and abundance. Regularly writing down your successes creates a record of your accomplishments. No matter how big or small its recommended you keep a record that you can re-read whenever you need a reminder of how amazing you truly are. Our feelings are an integral part of who we are. You can’t be an authentic person without acknowledging and feeling all of your feelings. Don’t shy away from uncomfortable feelings like anger, anxiety, and sadness. If you deny them, you deny a part of yourself. Learn to express your feelings in a healthy, respectful way.

5. Take good care of your body & have downtime. Good health is priceless. Give yourself the gift of being and feeling physically well. Eat healthily, exercise regularly, get your 7-8 hours of sleep, and drink lots of water. Don’t forget your vitamins and herbal alternatives.

It’s ok to be busy while you are creating your dreams but we must remember to slow down from time to time.  We have to allow our bodies and mind to rest. You don’t have to do it all and have everything under control, some things in life are just beyond our control. Prioritize what matters most and learn let go of any guilt in saying no. Rest is the most rejuvenating and a basic form of self-love.

Treating yourself is something special that you just give yourself. Be good to yourself by giving yourself treats “just because”. Hobbies can be relaxing, challenging, fun, creative, athletic, social, or educational. Find something that you enjoy and meet your needs.

Your relationship with yourself is the most important and longest relationship you’ll ever have. Spend some time learning to love yourself more. Let you love light the way!

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